It has been a bit of a boring week at ourcottages (click here). Although we have had a few friends staying its been too cold and wet to play out much and worse still there didn’t seem to be much food in the offing which leads directly onto my main concern this week. FOOD.
Has anyone noticed how much food humans eat (well Master and Mistress anyway). My rations consist of ONE meal a day (Master and Mistress would add that I get lots of treats but that doesn’t count). Master and Mistress start the day with Breakfast. By breakfast time it is already 12 hours since I was last fed, so its about time for me to get some food. But oh no. All I get is a couple of mistress’s cornflakes (nothing from master). 11:00 comes and it is time for morning coffee plus of course the odd biscuit or something. I sit there on my best behaviour but nothing for Smudge. A few hours later and it is Lunch time. By this time I am almost expiring with hunger but do I get anything? NO I don’t. In the afternoon it is tea break time. Now as you know, if we are out, that means an Afternoon Tea for mistress but nothing for us. At last dinner time comes round. Now although, again, we get absolutely nothing at least we know it is getting near to feeding time.
At last when they have washed up and messed about doing pointless things it is at long last our turn to be fed. Even then mistress prolongs the agony by doing this and that. Then the worse thing possible usually happens. The phone rings. “Leave the damn thing”. “Give me my food”. But oh no, mistress leaves our food where it is and answers the phone. It could be another 10 to 15 mins before she comes back to worry about us. I could have died of malnutrition in the mean time. When at last Mistress puts our bowls on the floor we then have to go through the “Sit”, “Wait” routine. “Come on hurry up”. Then at long last 24 hours since I was last fed I hear the magic words “OK Smudge”. The problem is that 2-3 minutes later that is it and I then have to wait another 24 hours to be fed again. No wonder I am wasting away.
I have been carefully monitoring other dog owners over the last few weeks and I think some dogs get fed more often than me. How fair is that? Maybe I should swap owners.