Following our morning constitution around our cottages (click here) grounds with mistress, I always pop around the cottages just to make sure everything is Ok and to see if anyone has left anything out to eat. This morning I noticed that Bluebell Cottage door was open so I wandered in. Imagine my amazement when I spotted that their dogs breakfast was sitting there all alone and beckoning me to help eat it. Well what could I do. Its only courteous to empty a food bowl isn’t it. I had assumed I hadn’t been spotted, so it was a bit shocked when 1/2 an hour later I got a good telling off from mistress. I am not too sure how I got caught. May be it was idiot brother who sneaked on me. What was even worse, I got a reduced ration at dinner time. I get little enough as it is. To reduce it is just not fair.
Waiting for Dinner
What is more we had to go down town shopping (I think it was a punishment). I am not keen on town. For one thing I have to go in the CAR and another we have to be on our leads. Worse still I got master (usually he takes idiot brother). When I am with master there is no stopping and I have to walk at heal or he gets very cross. I am a roughy toughy field dog not some kind of trained pet. I need the open fields, the air in my fur, the earth under my feet (and a warm duvet by the fire). Shopping is always the same. Mistress disappears inside and we are left outside with master. Then on to the next shop. Same again. And so on for 1/2 an hour or so. What is the point. What does she do in these shops. I know sometimes she brings out sausage rolls for me to look after. But I had better not go down that road. I am already in big trouble today.
For the first time ever we have had loads of apples on our apple tree at our cottages (click here). Usually there are one or two but this year there are loads. Unlike, thanks to master, our plum tree that has no plumbs at all this year (but we don’t talk about that). This afternoon Andrew and Joanna came up to pick ‘some’ Apples but went away with 7 carrier bags full. We of course helped. Well actually I watched and Smudge found an apple to eat and munched happily away on it which got mistress a bit worried. Apparently Apples (less pips) are good for us. I personally found them revolting. Give me a good old fashioned treat any day but of course Smudge will eat anything.
Me with MY apple
This morning was all a bit traumatic. The power went off before everyone was up and about. All sorts of master’s computer equipment started beeping etc. Now I am not exactly a timid dog (except for cows, sheep, large dogs, anything big, the odd napkin etc.) but I do find that beeping sounds get to me. Probably because Smudge completely looses it when things go beep. But then Smudge can be scared of his own shadow (unless there is food around). Luckily master came down soon after and let us out and turned off all the beeps. The power was off for about an hour but that was bad enough. Then what happens? They leave me with Smudge while they go off to Buxton to see a ‘Craft Fair’. We could have gone too! Or better still I could have gone and left Smudge behind. They hadn’t been gone more than an hour and it all happened again. The lights went off, the radio (for some reason mistress leaves it on for us) went off and the beeping started again. Luckily it only lasted a few minutes and everything came back to normal. Smudge went back to sleep and I continued with my security duties. I was, however, very glad when they got back. They really shouldn’t leave us (well not me anyway). I am sure there must be some European Dog’s Rights Act that says we shouldn’t be left alone.
Me being 'washed down'
Well I know it is idiot brother that is supposed to be doing this blog but its about a problem we have had with a cow so it is not much point asking him as he was hiding behind a fence.
There I was making monumental decisions at our cottages (click here) such as ‘should I turn over now’ or ‘should I leave it for a bit longer’ when a phone call came in saying there was a cow on our back lawn. Well I was ready immediately. Cow dog to the rescue. Unfortunately Mistress and Master didn’t quite see it that way. Something about I would be more of a nuisance than a help. Cheek! Anyhow they went out in the drizzly rain to sort the cow out. Well of course without my help they made a total hash of it. As soon as they had got it back into the field it just jumped over the broken wall again back into the garden (I could have told them that is what would happen). So they had to get it out again. In the end they realised that they needed my skills. I had to sit guarding the broken wall (with mistress) while master went off to get a new piece of electric fence (that keeps the damn things out).
Mistress was having a bit of a problem controlling them as they can be quite cunning if you don’t know them. One can faint to the left while another makes a break for the wall. However, once I was on the job some semblance of control was established. They know me. And they know I won’t be messed with. So they started towing the line and behaving themselves. Idiot brother was of course no where to be seen. You could hear a distant bark as he tried telling them what to do from the safety of our front garden. They of course just ignored him.
When at last master got back and set up the electric fence we could all relax a bit. We then just had to make sure they weren’t so stupid as to walk through it. Luckily they weren’t and we could all go back in. What do I then get for my troubles? A wash down! I don’t think I deserved that. I wasn’t particularly muddy (well maybe just a bit). At least I got a chew for helping although why idiot brother got one too, I have no idea.
The perpetrator being disrespectful
Anyhow mistress has awarded cow no 885 two ASBOs. One for coming into the garden the first time and a second for coming in again. She nearly gave it three. The third would have been for disrespectful behavior (see photo). I must point out that any cow getting three ASBOs in a season becomes Beef Burgers (which I hope I will be allowed to sample).
PS – I have just helped to clear the drive of cows and what have I had in return – Another Full WASH. It just isn’t fair.
Me posing with Mistress at Monsal head
At long last we have found a way of getting mistress to keep up with us. It was masters idea. Stick her on two wheels. Tuesday looked like it was going to be the best day for some time so it was decided we would go for a walk. As the tunnels along the Monsal trail are now open there are a couple of cycle hire places along the trail. So off we went to Hassop Station (about 10 mins from ourcottages (click here)). We had to wait in the car while they got kitted out. Both came back wearing funny hats and these 2 wheeled things. They did look a bit silly. Anyway as soon as we set off we knew something was different. We kept getting yelled at to get out of the way. Not usually a problem as we are miles ahead of them (especially mistress). Once we had figured out that it wasn’t going to be one of those backwards and forwards type walks we started to enjoy it.
Mistress keeping up with us.
Not only was mistress keeping up with us, we didn’t get any of the ‘admiring the scenery’ thing. So we actually progressed rather than dithering about. It did mean that we hadn’t as much time to explore and check things out but it was a nice change to keep going.
We got as far as Millers Dale, where we had started last weeks walk, before mistress was complaining about being exhausted (we were just getting warmed up). So they found a bench and sat down to lunch. For the first time ever we had lunch with another group of walkers. Once I had figured out I wasn’t going to get anything else to eat from master and mistress I put on my ‘I am a starved dog’ look and went round the other walkers. Works every time. Loads of tit-bits.
On the way back mistress realised why she had felt so tired. It had been uphill all the way from Hassop which of course meant it was downhill all the way back. That made her very happy. We got back to Hassop in time for what mistress felt was a well deserved afternoon tea.
At Hassop for afternoon tea
Just an aside. I must tell you what idiot brother did before we went off for a walk. Mistress took us out for our morning constitutional but he spent the entire time in the bushes behind the car park. When he emerged he was absolutely covered with those little sticky balls. You know the ones that get everywhere. The idiot had been crawling through the weeds and everything. Master spend about 30 mins trying to get them out of his fur and from behind his ears etc. There were 100’s of them . I think he still has a few stuck to him.
Oh and before you ask – yes they are both complaining about sore bums today.